Friday, October 28, 2011

Dream: Out There


That's what I was, and I was thankful that I'd practiced being blind as a child...just in case.
But this, this was not the same as toe-ing my way across my safe bedroom, bumping into soft, upholstered furniture, giggling at my own awkwardness.

I crawled sightlessly across a strange, cold, cement floor on my stomach. The coppery, pungent smell of thick blood filled my nostrils, and I realized that the blood was mine. There was little pain at this point. I'm not sure if that's because I wasn't hurt as badly as I made myself out to be, or because my subconscious was repressing the pain in an effort to keep me sane enough to escape this increasingly perilous situation.

Somebody had done something bad to me, and now that it was over and the Bad One had gone away, it was time to find my way back home. Blindly.

My fingertips traced the cracks in the floor. I pushed into them, using them for leverage to pull my weak and damaged body along. The slipperiness of the warm blood helped me to slide myself more hastily.

I had no idea where the exit was. A welcoming waft of air blew past me. I turned my face into it and smelled the tantalizing aroma of freshly baked blueberry muffins.




I followed. I grunted as I scooted, scaring myself by not crying. Surely I should be crying. How inhuman could I be that I didn't think this was worth a few sobs?

Fuck it, I thought. I'll cry later when I'm safe at home with my mom and a basket full of muffins.

But that couldn't happen either. Mom was already gone. Much more gone than I was at that point, and I almost cried at the memory of that, but stifled it when I remembered that I was wasting time thinking about this nonsense. I should have been concentrating on getting the hell out of there.

A wall. I bumped into it and felt along the bottom, struggling to reach a doorway. It seemed to take a very long time, but the closer I came, the louder the low hum of an air conditioner became. I don't know why I didn't notice that before. I could have used it as a guide.

I think I was in a garage. I began to notice the stench of my father, like motor oil and cigarettes swirling in my head. This made sense to me, because he had been a mechanic all the years I lived with him growing up. Nowadays, he's a truck driver, and I have no idea what he smells like.


The passageway was there. I felt along the bottom where the door meets the threshold, and I pulled myself up by grabbing the knob and hoisting my body against the wall. I was heavier and weaker than I had ever been. I wasn't sure if I would be able to walk after this. Just my luck to be blind and crippled in one little outing. This is why I should never have left the house. These are the kinds of things that happen out there.

The light spilled over me like pink, silk ribbons.





  1. So... does she make it out? Is she OK? Damn it! I can't handle the suspense!

  2. Intrigued. I want to know what happened and why. Are you going to continue with this?

  3. I loved this Nessa. Is it a story from a dream you had? I used to write about dreams all the time.

  4. Oh, the fingertips in the cracks of the cold cement floor really got to me. You'd think she'd be screaming, especially with the smell of blood all around!

    More! More!

  5. whoa! this was insanely good. there's a whole bunch of little things i want to compliment, but when i try to pick just a few it doesn't seem right to leave the others out...but i loved the 'irrelevant!' and the pink silk ribbons and the part about practicing being blind as a child...and everything else!

  6. Julianna. I made it out, I just woke up!

    Light-I'm thinking about using parts of this in a longer story, as an opener maybe, but it's far in the future.

    Dicky- I I dream for all the people who never dream.

    Mel- Thanks. Right back atcha, girl.

    Jayne-screaming is for sissies.

    id-thanks. I actually thought of you when I was writing it. I knew you'd love it.

  7. Just the right story for Halloween!