I seem to have picked up a predator.
I met him at my high school reunion. I didn't know him in school, except that he was a bible thumper who went around trying to bring every lost soul to Jesus. As you know, I steer clear of bible thumpers. We were not friends in school. I may have actually called him a moron way back then. He says I did, but I don't remember it. High school is a blur.
While I was at the Reunion Gala, three of my old girlfriends noticed that he was "stalking" me, so they gave me the inside story. While he was dating one of them in high school, he tried to make out with the other, and then flirted with the third! What a jerk!
I found out later that he was the one who nominated me for Most Eligible Bachelorette, as if every unmarried woman is on the prowl for a man. Clearly, he completely misunderstands me.
He's been trying like crazy to stick to me for the last couple of months. He texts me, and he comments on my Facebook posts and he sometimes reads my blog posts and e-mails me about them.
Mind you, anything he says in a public forum is "safe." I couldn't accuse him of being a predator outright, based on those public comments alone, but I have dealt with his kind before. I am aware of his intentions, and I know the basics of how his mind works.
He's searching for an in, you see.
He's seeking my weaknesses and intends to exploit them to his benefit. That's how predators work.
He gives me a sob story of how he's not getting along with his wife; she's abusive toward him, and she's making herself out to be the victim. (This isn't the truth. This is just what he tells me. I have a friend who knows his wife, and she swears they have the perfect marriage.) Anyway, Mr. Predator wants me to meet him for coffee so we can talk about his failing, abusive marriage, because he knows that I've been through it, and I will be able to relate to his situation.
But that doesn't work on me, because my past is not a weakness for me. It's just a part of my past, and not a very big part. It only lasted six and a half years. I left that relationship fifteen years ago. Just like high school, it is a blur.
Then he decides he, too, has a novel in him, despite claiming at the reunion that he doesn't read much, just watches movies. So he wants me to read some of his stuff and give him pointers, because he likes the way I write, and all of a sudden, he wants to be a writer too. I tell him I don't have time for that sort of thing. I barely have time to write my own book. If he wants honest criticism, he should take a class or something.
After the first few weeks, I started to not respond to his texts right away. I let them sit there for a while, and then later I would claim to have been busy at work or in a movie, or taking a nap, or writing or picking kids up from school. Once, I told him I was on a date, even though I wasn't. He didn't text back, and I was happy to have shaken him off.
I didn't notice when he deleted me from Facebook, but he sent another friend request a week or so ago. I simply ignored it. Then, out of the blue, he shows up at my job. He told me he was there to try the salad bar. That doesn't explain why he was hanging around the meat counter, but hey, maybe he likes raw steak in his salad, what do I know? I was polite to him. I had to be. I was at work.
Then he sends me a text asking if he's done something to offend me. How was I supposed to answer that? Taking the safe road, I just responded, "Do you feel that you've done something to offend me? Are you under the impression that I am easily offended?" He never answered.
Maybe he gave up.